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Everyone is born with the capacity to feel fear. The fears of the growing child will change with his age, and may increase or decrease depending upon his environment, the parent's attitudes and the individual's emotional life. Sometimes a child will shed all fears when he learns about new noises and objects around him. As they grow older they will learn that there are certainly things to fear which may really hurt them. The basic fear a child has is that his mother may stop loving him and also protecting him.
When we mature we don't stop being afraid, sometimes our fears will help protect us from danger and we will learn to exercise caution and also planning. During these years as a young child these fears are very real to him, even though we may think as adults they the fears are unnecessary and they should not be frightened.
As a newborn loud noises will frighten a child, sudden movements, strangers in the room, etc. A child can feel anxiety at a very early age from the sights, sounds and noises around him. As he grows he can feel the fear of being left alone. Buildings, cars, buses, elevators, etc. can make him fearful.
Usually by the age of five a child becomes very fearless. Sometimes he will have dreams that will upset him of losing a parent and other such items.
A parent just cannot prevent a child's fears. He can lessen fears and help change them into socially useful reactions. A happy, secure home is the best guard against unreasonable fears. In general, children are more frightened if they are home alone and the parents are not with them.
Sometimes a parent or even parents will be very fearful of things in general in their lives and this will reflect upon the child. We need as parents to be very careful in not letting the child realize our fears.
We can teach our children without making them fearful. They can be taught how to light a match without being told they will burn to death. They can be taught to cross streets carefully so as not to get hit by a passing automobile. There
are so many ways we can take the time and confidence to teach our children not to be fearful.
Parents should not lie to their children for instance when they are going to get a shot, they need to be truthful and say yes it will hurt but only for a moment. If they need to have any medical tests done then they need to be told the truth ahead of time. If a parent tells a child there will be no pain in having a shot and he feels the pain then there is a loss of confidence in the parent and that is something that should be avoided whenever possible. We want our children to respect us as parents and also to have trust in our advice and feelings.
Sometimes a child has a painful experience, such as the death of a grandparent and there is a fear that other relatives will not be with them and this situation needs to be handled very carefully also with understanding, love and confidence.
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